where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
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