I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
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