Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
