And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Randomize
