these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Randomize
