apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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