so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Randomize
