if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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