fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
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