You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
