white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Randomize
