she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
