Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
barbara walters just said penis...
i just google imaged poop.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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