No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize