this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
