I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
I wear drunk well.
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