it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
