I wannas sexs uuuuu
plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
