i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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