R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Randomize
