i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
