Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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