This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
wow bdsm is so cute
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
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