**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
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