You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
Randomize
