Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
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