my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
