U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
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