We should be called the Road Head Warriors
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
Let's get the cat blown out
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
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