mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize