Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Randomize
