very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Randomize
