Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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