I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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