I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
She even gives head with a lisp.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize