therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
