Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Im part way to drunk.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
