i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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