am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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