I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
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