North Korea, Best Korea!
i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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