I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
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