So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
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