is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
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