i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
