did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
