I wannas sexs uuuuu
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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