my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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