I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
Randomize
