All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
