I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
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