I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
